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We’re gonna point out that Seagal is fat, lazy, and pathetic, but not his history of owning human slaves, killing dogs with a tank during his time as a cop, or mafia ties?
We’re an equal opportunity educational environment here. Enlighten us to the other ways he’s a shitbag!
Aikido is so fucking stupid.
I don’t think I’d call what’s happening here anything more complicated than the Macarena
The Macarena is a more effective method of self defense than aikido.
This scene makes me irrationally angry. It is truly one of the worst, laziest “just flail your arms at each other” choreographies out there. It’s not the only one of that kind of lazy movie fighting, but this one bothers me extra with how it doubles down on laziness with that chair. The dudes never even try to get close enough to hit the other. Someone like Jackie Chan would have found a way to creatively use that chair and turn it into an interesting concept for a fight that’s enjoyable to watch but that fat fuck is just sitting there doing nothing. That fucking Ponytail Michelin Man. His music makes me wanna pour acid into my ears too.
Someone like Jackie Chan would have found a way to creatively use that chair
You have to be able to lift the chair
You have to be able to lift FROM the chair
I choose to believe that the camera operator was supposed to zoom in so we couldn’t see the chair and either forgot or decided to capture the full goofiness of the set-up.
Sometimes, I gotta sit up and have good posture to grab something. It’s exhausting.
When I was a kid I dreamed about VR RPGs where you’d run around swinging the sword… like 10 minutes of that had me back to using a controller. The real first person point of view is amazing, but It’s plenty realistic enough for me to be controlling it with a gamepad.
itoldaso
